asheris: (happy)
[personal profile] asheris
The Bible has been translated into lolcat.

I'm sure this is sacreligious in SO many ways, but it cracked me up. So there. kthx bai.

Genesis 1: Boreded Ceiling Cat makinkgz Urf n stuffs

1 Oh hai. In teh beginnin Ceiling Cat maded teh skiez An da Urfs, but he did not eated dem.

2 Da Urfs no had shapez An haded dark face, An Ceiling Cat rode invisible bike over teh waterz.

3 At start, no has lyte. An Ceiling Cat sayz, i can haz lite? An lite wuz.4 An Ceiling Cat sawed teh lite, to seez stuffs, An splitted teh lite from dark but taht wuz ok cuz kittehs can see in teh dark An not tripz over nethin.5 An Ceiling Cat sayed light Day An dark no Day. It were FURST!!!1

6 An Ceiling Cat sayed, im in ur waterz makin a ceiling. But he no yet make a ur. An he maded a hole in teh Ceiling.7 An Ceiling Cat doed the skiez with waterz down An waterz up. It happen.8 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has teh firmmint wich iz funny bibel naim 4 ceiling, so wuz teh twoth day.

9 An Ceiling Cat gotted all teh waterz in ur base, An Ceiling Cat hadz dry placez cuz kittehs DO NOT WANT get wet.10 An Ceiling Cat called no waterz urth and waters oshun. Iz good.

11 An Ceiling Cat sayed, DO WANT grass! so tehr wuz seedz An stufs, An fruitzors An vegbatels. It happen.12 An Ceiling Cat sawed that weedz ish good, so, letz there be weed. (and catnipz 2, so wen i makes kittehs they can getz hai.)13 An so teh threeth day jazzhands.

14 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has lightz in the skiez for splittin day An no day.15 It happen, lights everwear, like christmass, srsly.16 An Ceiling Cat doeth two grate lightz, teh most big for day, teh other for no day.17 An Ceiling Cat screw tehm on skiez, with big nails An stuff, to lite teh Urfs.18 An tehy rulez day An night. Ceiling Cat sawed. Iz good.19 An so teh furth day w00t.

...

29 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, the Urfs, I has it, An I has not eated it.30 For evry createded stufs tehre are the fuudz, to the burdies, teh creepiez, An teh mooes, so tehre. It happen. Iz good.

31 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, teh good enouf for releaze as version 0.8a. kthx bai.


From Genesis 2:

19 An out of teh ground Ceiling Cat madez all teh aminals on teh urth An in teh see, An all teh birds up in sky (An sum liek ostridges who cudnt flyz, just 4 fun). (Ceiling Cat is raely good at makingz mud pies. srsly.) An brought them unto teh man 2 c what he would call them: An what teh man called every living aminal, dat was its naim. (if they didnt like it, tuff tamales, they wuz stuck wif it.)

20 An teh man gave names 2 all teh aminals, An 2 teh burdies of sky (An to teh onez who cudnt flyz) An teh aminals in teh see, (so they wudnt feel left out), An to every aminal in teh field; but for man wuznt no good helper fo him, not even ne1 to talk 2 in chatroom.21 An Ceiling Cat caused a deep sleep to fall upon teh man, An he slept; An he took 1 of his ribs, cuz it has a flavr. 22 An Ceiling Cat can haz teh rib frum man maded into wimman, but did not eated it cuz he brot her to teh man. He sai O hai, I maded u a man but wifout teh dingy. Have fun, kthxbai.

Date: 2007-12-18 08:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] asqmh.livejournal.com
*hangs head*

I'm one of the translators....

Date: 2007-12-19 08:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] asheris.livejournal.com
That is So. Freaking. Cool!

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